Tags
choices, connections, fear, internet dating, Interpersonal relationship, love, online sex, people, people heterosexual, sex, world wide web, www
Today I wanted to present to you, the reader, my belief that the internet has created a group of people who are unable to make commitments. People who prefer contact via whatsapp and google chat but are reluctant to talk on the phone, and whilst flirtatious texts are sent and invariably photos are sent. Once these photos are sent, interest is lost.
Through the internet, people have all become their own porn stars with sexting, videos and photos offering visual aids for the person behind the screen. Why is this done? Why is this required? Isn’t it better to be with someone physically? Whilst body fluids may not be exchanged, which is healthier, it has become lonely. Masturbation behind a screen is a lonely isolated and sad act.
It seems that whilst the internet has opened up the world and made it smaller; it has also allowed us to remove the mess of life and relationships. A lot of online daters just want a photo or two, some want a sexy flirtatious conversation. Others…and yet most online daters claim they want to settle down and have a long-term relationship, it seems most (and I include myself in this) are afraid and unable to commit.
We are afraid of being hurt again; so it is far more acceptable and easier to participate from the sidelines, every now and then subbing ourselves into the team, only to return to the bench after the first few minutes, with rational reasons and sometimes irrational reasons why a potentially good relationship won’t work.
We are willing but only willing to participate through a screen. The brief human contact we may have with someone from the internet is enough to satisfy our needs but we don’t want our lives to become messy and confusing.
It strange that so many of my gay friends are eager to commit and work at their relationships with their partner and fight for equal rights and gay marriage and us, heterosexuals, seem to be running a mile from any physically relationship. We are only too happy to sit in front of our computer, and do some shopping on a dating website and then discard our shopping once we gained what we needed. There has been no ‘harm’ or ‘damage’ and we can continue with our lives behind a screen.
This is not a moral argument as one of the basic human needs, is to be physically and emotionally involved with someone and the internet has turned this need into the ‘throw away’ culture that we live in today.
The internet has failed in unifying us and improving our world; instead it is creating a new human, a human who is unable to make connections unless there is a screen between us.
One should never stop progress but develop with it. The internet has stunted our growth for we are now unable to connect with each other in a physical and emotional manner. We are unable to be with someone in a long-term relationship. We have become human androids. No longer are we thinkers or feelers, lovers and partners but rather trapped in a web, the world wide web.
I think I would prefer my world to be messy, my bed sheets to be sticky and to hear the snoring a man I can touch next to me. But how do we change what has become the new heterosexual?
It is time to reconnect to the human next to you, they just may be the one!