In this world of dating where one makes contact with a brief message so that the person will turn to your profile and read it, men and women will have experiences of people ignoring their messages with no response at all. I question the politeness of this action!
One can easily argue that time is short and if you are not interested- why bother? But have we come so far that we just ignore people who have made the effort to contact you, even those one’s who simply send a ‘Hi’ or ‘Do you want BHM sex?’ -Which I received and still have no idea what BHM sex is!
Now, in all honesty, I have ignored emails like those above, but as we have become a society that seems jaded and with our fast-paced lifestyles and our ability to quickly eliminate people, I wonder if we are actually do ourselves a disservice.
In my world, I should be I teaching respect. Where is the respect in me ignoring someone who has made the effort to contact me?
This applies to people when we go on a date, we may have a tiresome hour conversing over a coffee or glass of wine, trying to find a link or a connection and then return home, planning to never to speak to them again. I am guilty of this too!
And I have heard of some horrendous horror stories of women walking out on a date and leaving a man stranded, left to pay for the drinks. Of people writing abusive messages to people when they have expressed their interest in another person. It is no wonder people are becoming afraid of making commitments, if we behave in this manner!
These stories, made me reflect on my own internet dating actions, and whilst I have never behaved in this manner, I have ignored men who have contacted me; which is incredibly rude!
I should and I am capable of politely thanking a person for their interest and politely telling them that they are not what I am looking for. This is in no way hurtful, a person is not left wondering whether what they said or written has offended another, and in general most people seem really pleased just to receive this brief message.
So in this evolving world where we have shifted the way we communicate, we can very simply hold onto respect, respect for yourself and for those taking the risk of contacting you by politely writing to them:
“Thank you for your kind interest. Unfortunately, I feel we will not match. Good luck in your search!”
Three simple sentences; it is not too much to ask for, and the person on the other end will at least know where they stand and appreciate the kind response.
When I do this, most men thank me and wish me well on my dating journey.
A little appreciation will make this online dating world more human and humane!
And to those men who have had women walk out on a date with them; I can promise there are many of us who are well-mannered and polite.